Monday, February 13, 2012

Movie Review: The Grey

One word: HORRIBLE!!

(And now I shall elaborate..)

On Friday a friend and I decided to go catch Denzel's latest: Safe House. We got to the theater around 10:30ish. The 10:40 show as well as the 11 (-something) show was Sold Out! Due to the lack of nothing else to do we decided to catch The Grey instead.

I had no idea what the hell this movie was about. The commercials ain't never give you shit! I thought it was about some supernatural force out in the snow or something. Y'all seen the previews: Men looking scared in the snow and running, right?

Well, I hate to tell you, but that ain't what the hell the movie is about at all. The movie is like the biggest waste of money EVER! And just how did they rope Liam into this bull?! He is too good of an actor for this mess. He played his role well, but the movie is just too damn shitty. So shitty in fact, that his level of talent seems ill-placed.

Let me tell you how the story goes. (And I'ma spoil it...Idc.) These guys are out in Alaska somewhere doing whatever the hell their job is out there. I don't know what the hell their job is. But the job is outside. Maybe they drill for oil or something. (who knows) Liam's job is to kill area wolves that try to attack the crew while working. So, throughout the entire movie he keeps having flashbacks of his wife and him laying in bed, her stroking his face and telling him to not be scared. He contemplates suicide like within the first 10 minutes of the movie. He doesn't go through with it. Instead, he boards a plane with the rest of his crew to go home. And I figured he was going home to his wife, but later in the movie it's suggested that she died?? The suggestion was so subtle... Just what was the aim with this damn movie?! (I have NO idea!) My friend says that he actually came out and said his wife had passed away. I musta been sleep. *shrug*

So anyways, the plane crashes in the middle of nowhere and the few surviving soon realizes that there are wild, territorial wolves in the area that want them out!! Soooooo.... that's basically it. The entire movie they are trying to escape these wolves. They (Liam and his people) are killed off one by one. In the end, only Liam is alive. He finds himself right smack dab in the middle of the wolves' den and the movie ends with him scrappin' up to battle like 10 wolves.

Seriously. He tapes some miniature liquor bottles between his fingers and breaks them on a rock and tapes something to the other hand...I think a knife. Then he says his lil line from is daddy's poem, something like: "To live and die on this day." And the movie ends. We all know how that scene will end. No need for it to be shown on the big screen. That's about the only thing I understand about that film.

I mean, really!!..An entire movie. In the snow. Men isolated. Just running from these wolves. And I mean, running! They covered lots of ground trying to get away from these beasts. And I just don't get it. There really wasn't no adventure. They just continued encountering wolves and being plucked off one by one. That's it. Dumb! Who decided to give this garbage a spot on the Big Screen??!

I'm probably too late to save anyone from wasting money on this because it was released last month and all, but if you were late (like me) and have thoughts of giving this a chance, SAVE YO MONEY!!

Two HUGE Thumbs DOWN!!

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